There are so many different versions of Real Housewives that you could join, but you have to live in the area. So, before you find that mansion, brownstone, high rise apartment, or summer house, let’s figure out which city and cast fits your personality. Let’s start with the obvious…
1. You’re making an elaborate dinner, what are you making?
A. Cook? I don’t cook. I have a chef making a seven course meal
B. My grandmother’s pasta recipe with homemade noodles
C. I also don’t cook, but my chef is making upscale comfort food
D. My friend is a chef, he’s cooking for us at his restaurant
E. Crabs and lobster fresh from the water
2. You have a part time career, what do you do?
A. I’m a former actress. I’m still making money on appearances
B. I am an amazing event planner
C. I’m a former model, but now I do some singing
D. I have a huge and growing business. It’s definitely not part time
E. I support my husband’s career and do charity work
3. One of the girls in the season offended you, what did she do?
A. She accused me of drinking too much…as if
B. I heard she called me a stripper
C. She’s claiming I’m cheating on my husband
D. She stole the man I wanted
E. She didn’t come to my event
4. You’ve got a big trip coming up, where are you going?
A. Somewhere exotic with the best fashion vibes
B. The beach, but not “the shore”
C. We’re looking to get back to our roots
D. Summer houses. We don’t need to go far
E. Somewhere we can get on a boat. But we don’t jump off the boat into the water.
5. You’re planning your big birthday party, what do you want to do?
A. You throw a giant party in your lavish backyard and there is a dress code
B. You organize a trip to a winery or the casino for your girlfriends
C. You throw a giant party and have one of your music buddies perform
D. You rent out a venue in the city for a giant party and serve things from your business. What better way to celebrate than to self promote?
E. You find the most expensive venue in town and perform one of your secret talents
6. You’re getting ready for the reunion show, what are you most nervous to talk about?
A. Someone was going through medical problems, but they were being dramatic
B. Federal laws tend to make people nervous
C. The feud that will never end. She started it
D. I don’t want to listen to the girls talking about my man anymore
E. I am not jealous of that woman. She wants to be me
7. You’re thinking about a new catchphrase, what sounds good?
A. Money isn’t what’s important in this town, it’s who knows you
B. Family is everything, as long as they don’t manipulate you
C. I always play nice, you just might not play by my rules
D. If they can’t be happy for me, then they can’t be happy
E. You should always act with class, especially around a class act like me
8. You’re looking forward to next season, how are you trying to reinvent yourself?
A. I’m clean, sober, and ready to party
B. Orange only looks good on my skin, not in my wardrobe
C. There’s a ring on my finger, whether you like it or not
D. I’m single and very ready to mingle…and find a new husband
E. I’ve got a new house and a new look on life
You belong with the Real Housewives of Beverly Hills. You like elaborate mansions, but your life is about who knows you. If they aren’t talking about you, then you don’t exist. In this town, famous get’s you further than money. So get out there and make a name for yourself!
You belong with the Real Housewives of New Jersey. To you, family, food, and health matters most…but right behind that is a fancy lifestyle. Sure, some things have gone a little awry lately, but who doesn’t love a comeback? Here it’s the only place where mistakes make you even more popular.
You belong with the Real Housewives of Atlanta. Not only do you have the house to back it up, but you’ve got the skills. Whether you’re a model, singer, or you just have an amazing publicist, Atlanta is where you belong. So, time to sharpen those talents and find someone to fight with. After all, is it really an Atlanta season if there isn’t a giant feud?
You belong with the Real Housewives of New York. Here, it’s all about reinvention once your man does you wrong. All these ladies, well most of them, have all been faced with the idea of starting, not just their lives, but their search for romance all over. So, grab your highest heels, your push up bra (your first alimony check can pay for your boobs), and a tough attitude and you’re ready to find a man in the city that never sleeps.
You belong with the Real Housewives of Potomac and the Grand Dame herself. Nothing says class like Potomac. It’s all about how much money you have to give to charity, and how good you look doing it. Be careful though, there are rules for this town and they seem to be made up but the points do matter.
Obviously these aren’t all of the housewives, but that quiz would have just been too long. Andy would have to cut to a commercial break and there may be three parts to it. So tell me, where do you belong? I actually live right outside Potomac ,so I, by default, belong there. However, this quiz says I belong in Beverly Hills, so I may need to relocate. Any other Beverly Hills ladies? I may need to split rent with one of you. If not, maybe I can get a job at Sur until my Range Rover comes in.
I work hard during the day fighting the good fight one nosy background check at a time. But by night, I am transformed into the salacious romance writer of a college series called Elton Hall Chronicles. Earn extra credit with Violet. You may need to see the teacher after class. Explore the nearby firehouse with Annabelle. There may be a fireman ready to cool you down. Race the streets with Christie on the back of the bad boy’s motorcycle as she ditches Mr. Perfect. All three books are available now and the first two are on sale. So go back to school or experience college for the first time.
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